Friday, July 25, 2008

a harsh reality

the man in the picture........ i have this feeling that i'll end up just like him in the future.......
i was requested by a friend who happens to be a blogger to publish this post as a support for our dear friend Dr. mohammad who is struggling with his parents after they found out that he's gay.
what happened to him is a harsh reminder that our people are not ready for us , our society does not tolerate homosexuality in any way or form.
i think that it will take at least two generations for things to turn around for us (60 years approximately).
do not despair , life is still good (at least they're not hunting us down and killing us like iran which is a major progress in my view)
what happened to him made me think about it all, what would happen to me if my family finds out that i'm gay?
i know for sure that my father will be very angry and will probably try to beat me up (lol) , my mother hates homosexuals as she works in some hotline social helping center where people call and ask for help if they have social , Psychological problems.
she had many phone calls that related to homosexuality and she stated many times that she saw a homosexual on the street and that she felt disgusted , that homosexuality is an obamination (she's religious yeah) , that homsexuals are insects...etc (you name it i heard it)
well , it would a great shocker if she finds out that her loving son is one of the insects , i just know what her reaction will be like as my family will most probably kick me out of the house
i hate being a lying hypocrite but i can never come out , i don't think i can live a lonely life without my family (men are just shallow and not that dependable i'm afraid!)
i'm greedy , i'll attempt to have it all ! that's my plan ! a normal heteresexual life on the outside (i'll have to get married eventually) and a secret gay life in the closet.
for i am king of the closet.

this is his post :

I need help
Since my parents knew about my homosexuality, their behavior never return to normal; they never sleep or eat well, they are not socially active as they use to be!My mother constantly cries, & I see sadness & disappointing in my father's eyesAll what I'm looking for is any parents for a homosexual son or daughter (not necessarily accepting homosexuality) able to contact with my parents to tell them that it is not the end of the world that I'm homosexual!!!& it is not their guilt that I'm gay!!!I think when parents contact with parents (with same Crisis) they will give support & understanding to each otherPlease any one could help me in finding these parents contact me on my email: gayinjordan@hotmail.comOr write a comment under this post
Note: It is better if the mother can speak Arabic

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